Yor Ryeter

[1: 2,057 of 10,000] New Book of Life

In Journal on April 9, 2021 at 10:52 AM
During my morning walk with my sister today, we saw the grasses with dews and she said the fairies worked their magic as she learned from the cartoon “The Fairly OddParents”. Photo credit: Jonas Weckschmied on Unsplash

I don’t always foresee when will a new blank book of my life needs to start because my human self have the fear of what if I’ll not be able to make it and the Universe let itself in and bring the right amount of shake up to lit my bun on fire. I’m moving!

In my previous books, I’ve let a lot of it unfold, unawake, I dip a bit of my toes but I’ve not fully immerse myself. I don’t regret it, I’m grateful instead that this time around I’m making new choices with my eyes wide awake, my body, soul and spirit are all in. I still don’t get everything right in alignment but I’m at a perfect spot that I’m contented and excited co-creating with the Universe.

I’m writing a new book of my life that involves starting my own business and likely to include moving to a new apartment. Fresh start that makes me smile, imagine new things, and surrender to little deliveries of magic into my way, after all I’m co-creating with full control of my emotions.

As I look back, I honor the steps I’ve made because I made the decisions based on what was true to me and my best at that time. I have full gratitude for the experience, for all that I’ve learned, the growth that I’ve gained only because I was there. My healing continues especially if I will keep on daring to fully live. With this new phase, there are tools that’ll be with be at all times –

  • I’ll never forget to have fun, to follow my joy, or what makes my heart fully smile
  • If I make mistake, I let my tears fall, I’ll be gentle on myself, be the first to forgive myself, and know that my pain is a lesson and opportunity for expansion
  • I’ll feel the sense of adventure, which means my definition of success may not always be the case that comes true, but I’ll keep saying yes to living in the moment, dust off and try again
  • I’ll keep showing up to heal people, to let people in to love me, and create arts that give me purpose to be alive

[1: 2,056 of 10,000] We Need Safe Knit

In Journal on March 14, 2021 at 8:53 PM

I always pretend that I am strong, it’s very rare that I will tell anyone that I’m hurting because I have not met a person who I believe is strong enough to carry the burden that I keep so close in my heart. To trick everyone especially myself, I always say that I am capable to handle it alone because how could I survived this long after all those traumas.

I may have survived my traumas but it came with consequences. For a long time, I have closed my heart and never let anyone to hear my truth, making me carry pains that could have been divided, healed, and transmuted. It took me a lifetime to recognize but it’s never too late to admit that I have to fully forgive my stubbornness, my fears, and my pride. I am strong but I needed help. There’s no one stronger than me to face my battle because they were meant to be mine to conquer but I don’t need to face them alone.

Life on Earth is limited and it’s crazy how I have fallen to close off my world and only stick to what’s familiar. How I run away to not repeat the same mistake of getting hurt yet still bruising my chance to trust because each person and each circumstance comes with unique gift and different outcome depending on my attitude coming in.

What it all boils down? We need to start forging new and lasting friendships. We need connection with others because living alone is pretty lonely. May I finally find new friends that I can show up without editing myself because I am seen and heard anytime. That’s why I like blogging because I pretend that you’re my friend and I never edit myself.

Photo credit: Katarzyna Grabowska on Unsplash

[1: 2,055 of 10,000] Doubt Creeps In

In Journal on March 9, 2021 at 7:31 PM

I stumble without my plan because it feels like living through life without proper check points before reaching my destination. I see the shadow side of plans and that’s stronghold control. I was surprised that there’s something more scarier to that though. When I start building this anxiety listening to my pouring doubts and fears that I’m too rigid of my plan then am not allowing my muse to glide through. For two nights, I fight back sleep, overthinking, going through the plan one more time and see how can I loosen it. I wanted to stay awake and figure out a solution, do I need to come up with a new one?

Oh I was also told that I’m too much in my head and I’m falling into my own trap again. Circling to my obsession and grip of a future that depends on the choices that I make in the present moment. I’ve been advised to see things in a different perspective because I have all the ingredients but I question am I supposed to cook something different, which I have no solid idea how can I make that happen. In my chaotic mind, there’s one thing I’m avoiding though, to sit in stillness to consult my Inner Knowing and ask, “What do I want?”

I process, I prayed, because the direction of my life will only need to come from my authentic voice. My mind is bleeding because it’s not connecting to my intuition, to what I feel, and then the firework sparks and it kept cracking. I got it.

I have to follow my bliss. It’s not about changing the plan, it’s about surrendering my grip and obsession of the journey and the outcome. Right now, I have to accept that I’m good wherever way it lands. A message nudging me that I’ll never make the wrong choice because I have one consistent vision, it’s the paths to get there that have different flavors. The vision wasn’t flawed, my attitude to not allowing play to interrupt that plan that’s raising an issue. I’ve always been all right so why would I be afraid to take a risk this time if I’ll be doing what my Soul came here in this lifetime to do. With that, I’m at peace and my train keeps moving forward.

Photo credit: Marcos Paulo Prado on Unsplash