I could sense that you love me and I know that I am pushing you to someone else because I cannot possibly love you back. You deserve a great young man, someone who is free, and can commit. I am not sure what do I really feel toward you but you linger in my mind more than I could understand and permit. I joked that you marry me so you don’t leave me. I try to protect you and wish that I own you for my personal gain. It is lunacy to pretend nothing comes between us but I know I am just lying to myself.
One day I’m sure you will leave me. On that day, I know that it would bring me sadness. I wish I know what I should do for a pure one like you. It scares me to even imagine admitting that I am starting to fall in love with you. The truth is I have another woman in my life and I believe I love her; and yet when I see you I cannot help but to question what kind of love does linger to see another beating heart who is so close to me.
I longed that it wouldn’t be this difficult.