Yor Ryeter

[1: 2,027 of 10,000] Deleting Two Photos

In Journal on November 27, 2020 at 12:00 AM

I deleted two photos of a man I really like, but I don’t adore enough that I stopped talking to him. It’s been 9 months since I last exchange decent communication but the moment I deleted the last two photos from my smart phone that could prove I’ve ever talked to him I broke down and cry.

The last thread that I was holding, disappeared, made me feel losing him for another time. It surprised me that I’ve put him in a pedestal, and now it felt more final in my head space. I still remember his name. There are days that I remember the spark and then there are days it felt like I’ve moved on.

The following morning, I thought am I crying for the man I imagined him to be in my life, or was I grieving that I am craving for the love that I was giving him. He’s a reminder of my life’s romance and a creation of my perfect fantasy and for that I’m grateful. He’s a testament that at one point, I let my guard down and let someone in for a while.

It’s over. I have to be strong to accept that it’s done. I didn’t lose myself, I gained a lesson that I am capable to love. It’s time for a new story to tell.

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