My ego, the part of me that can constantly tell a story that I’m the best and worst – all for the sake to operate from fear instead of love, has obsession about time or age and it is dilapidating.
Some of my scared ego-talks:
- I want to be the youngest member of this club because I am special.
- I need to get that thing to elevate my status now.
- I am too old to become famously rich.
- I got white hairs… how do I expect to get a husband and raise children?
- 38 and still an employee? (even hearing this in a snotty remark)
- It will take time to learn and become an expert, how will I do school ‘again’ and still work to be a responsible adult and practical?
- Your peers have achieved so much in their career (company owner / VPs) while you are still a manager.
- You’re so slow.
- What is the point of doing great? Are you intending to leave a legacy, but wait who do you think you are who is worth leaving a legacy? You are going to die one day, so again, what is the point of all these hard works?
So how do I calm my fearful ego that is a part of me and that I lovingly call my intellect that needs a leader?
- I meditate and pray to calm my nerves. I don’t always get the answers when I meditate and pray, maybe I am not there yet, but the fact that I could become calm and not go to panic mode at all times that I even lose proper sleeps because I was paralyzed with the amount of goals I want to immediately achieve.
- I forgive myself that I have so much eagerness and not capable to move a mountain yet. And then I do what I can that leads to my ultimate goal. It doesn’t matter if it takes time to learn; so instead I lean on my incremental growth every day.
- Choose one battle at a time. Choose a team to help if it’s the additional ingredient of success. If I die before I achieve everything, I will be fine without regrets because I was able to accomplished some things.
- Treat my journey as mine and not to compare myself with others. My own growth is my business and the key is my life is rooted with good intentions.
- I enjoy the journey and celebrate the destination; and then I do it all over again with a new pursuit. If I wake up every morning, it means I have this moment to enjoy life, if a day turned out to be excruciating than I have hoped for, I could go to bed, release the past, and I will wake up the next morning again to have another clean slate.
What is your kryptonite and how do you overcome it?