Yor Ryeter

Posts Tagged ‘Life’

[1: 1,976 of 10,000] The Greatest Positive Distraction In Life

In Article on February 7, 2020 at 6:33 AM

fabrizio-verrecchia-BXwbfuM0cdk-unsplash

If I am weary waiting for a man to send me a message, agitating for a someone or something to happen… I have to push myself to do a “positive” distraction to not lose my mind.

Before I go for the good distraction, I should confess my current rabbit hole mood and that’s watching Tarot Card reading for my horoscope in YouTube, geez too excited to find out about the future! Or starting a whole new series to watch in Netflix, it’s a whole new commitment so I better check how many episodes and how long each episode is.

Now the good stuff, there’s one key ingredient of what’s in the greatest distraction and it should be doing something that I love or similar to what am truly passionate about. Anything that brings me joy without guilt but peace are key. For instance, writing a blog, reading a helpful book for my learning or growth or entertainment, or going out to connect with other people. These distractions make me forget time and draws me into a flow.

What’s your positive distraction?

Photo by Fabrizio Verrecchia on Unsplash

[1: 1,975 of 10,000] Huh! Childhood Hurt?

In Journal on February 5, 2020 at 11:58 PM

caroline-hernandez-agI0H_yMCVI-unsplash

My inner self knew that I am complete and I am loved but the fact that I have never let romance into my life, I am seriously unconsciously blocking it. I hired someone to coach me, well, anytime I needed to really learn and overcome something I sign up to work with the right person.

My parents never gave me up, nothing like that, but when my sister was born just eleven months after I was born, my grandmother (mom’s mom) happily volunteered to take care of me until she passed away and I started going to school so I moved back home.

Here’s the weird part, when I was asked to go back to my childhood memories, the moment when I started to feel unlove, I couldn’t remember it and I remember a business email I received even two or three years back. I can only rely on stories and then suddenly I started crying and my heart is breaking. It made sense that I got to be carefree and independent, believing that people leave because they die so there’s no point of investing on love and life, and the little me felt left out by my parents.

I am finally strong today to tell young Yor that I am here to love her unconditionally, she doesn’t need to be alone anymore, and we can make the best of life and not believing death is the answer to end a pain and get away from a broken heart. I am healing and for that I am grateful.

Photo by Caroline Hernandez on Unsplash

 

[1: 1,969 of 10,000] Have You Answered ‘What’s My Purpose In Life’?

In Journal on July 14, 2019 at 5:07 PM

michael-heuser-tI665XBDiAA-unsplash

At different times in my life, I have pulled out different answers and seek different places to help me come up with my answer.

The very first thing that made sense for me is I am here to spread the good news that there’s a God who created everything and I believe loves every human being. God is all-knowing that provides peace and the connection with everyone and everything. I don’t know everything and I don’t even have a language to describe my relationship with God but I’m contented for hearing about Him and I am spending the rest of my life deepening my relationship with Him through others and everything. The moment I have the sense of connection with God, feel His love and witness His miracles; I would like to share it with everyone so they may experience my joy.

Then added is I am here to create like my creator. I have a gift that can make me come alive whenever I am in the zone doing it. That whenever I am authentic for being myself, it inspires others to do great things. All because I am enjoying being me.

I am here to experience human life. To live in the present and love what is. To not believe the story that I create in my mind that is obsessed with worries, scarcity mentality, shame, and perfection.

My latest answer is I’m here to heal. I believed that people are born perfect but like my story, as I grow older, I have absorbed different pain including the pain of my parents that I forget my essence. I now believe that the first order is to take care of me and heal. To forgive myself and to examine my thoughts in order to make better choices in the present.

How about you, what is your purpose?

Photo by Michael Heuser on Unsplash

[1: 1,966 of 10,000] I Am Getting Old (Yay!)

In Journal on July 4, 2019 at 2:03 PM

Hair stylist Nat told me that my feeling whether am old or young depends on my perception. Will I defy the fact that I am having grey hair more than I have last year and the hair color that I used doesn’t necessarily cover the truth that I am aging?

I am starting to feel like I am broken; like a piece of toy that has parts that are starting to crumble and I don’t know how to stop it. I try to exercise, eat well, meditate, met a psychic, and yet I feel like I don’t understand the transition that I am going through. There’s a cloud over my head and I can’t see clearly and my body isn’t cooperating.

I have to be honest, it scares me to be old. What if I start forgetting things? What if I couldn’t be creative anymore? What if I get really sick? What if I have a bad back and broken bones? Those were my fears but just that fears but not my reality yet; so I am not losing hope. I know that this too will roll over like the rest of the things in the world.

[1: 1,965 of 10,000] The Defining Moment When I Knew I Desired To Write

In Journal on May 30, 2019 at 11:29 PM

ilya-pavlov-87472-unsplash

People who grew up loving what they do knew their deepest desire that they were meant to do it. I met a doctor who said, “I’ve always known that I wanted to become a doctor.” Great singers have the voice that blows our mind. Me… the defining moment when I knew I desired to write is because of my neighbour whom I considered an elder sister said, “You can make anything come true if you write it.”

My young mind understood that well I’ve always wanted a genie and that sounds pretty close in having one and the difference I didn’t even have a limitation of only three wishes. There was a time that my novel was a roadmap to my actual life, but that doesn’t always happen. What grew is my love affair with writing, not about making a wish come true, but it transitioned that it gives me the joy to write, and now I am at the point that I write to inspire people of what I write and for others to be infected of my joy because I am writing.

My beginning feels selfish and childish because it is what I was able to grasp and my point of experience in that life. Now, I am still selfish because I do write since it gives me pleasure but I think about others that may my writing gives another light to a path of seeing the beauty of life.

Photo by Ilya Pavlov on Unsplash

 

[1: 1,964 of 10,000] Do You Remember A Moment of Grace In Your Life?

In Journal on May 25, 2019 at 1:40 AM

eberhard-grossgasteiger-385455-unsplash

My heart is full of love right now. I feel so blessed and loved. I have something to be grateful for every day because I am enjoying life.

Don’t get me wrong, I still worry about work, disappointed that I can’t meet my deadline, but the deeper I am in shit the harder I prayed and asked for help especially wisdom from the Holy Spirit. My burden becomes lighter, and I get disciplined to finish one task after another.

My calendar in both professional and personal are so full, but every day, I sat down for meditation as a reminder that I can capture a moment of calm, and then I start moving. I learned to act without waiting for anyone’s permission or for the circumstance to be perfect.

Going back to my main question, do you remember a moment of grace in your life? It doesn’t have to be a big deal but notice the small miracles. Find those moments when you can feel your heart and soul soothed.

I noticed that whenever I listen to Nessun Dorma sang, there’s something magical that can bring me to tears, and those were my moments of grace. What raises through my mind is how grateful I am listening to this beautiful opera singers using their talent to serenade me (and the rest of the world); then I use mine to be an open vessel to allow the spirit to move me to touch you.

Photo by eberhard grossgasteiger on Unsplash

[1: 1,961 of 10,000] The Best State I’ve Ever Been

In Journal on March 2, 2019 at 6:01 PM

Wow, it’s been a while since my last post. I have been working on my well being. I’m very happy to where I am right now, challenged, and moving to create something that I can leave behind in this world. I feel like I’m living the new movie of Rebel Wilson where her world was perfect, only I didn’t get mobbed and hit my head on a steel post, but I am slowly awakening and I appreciate life.

I find solace in the present, I end and start the day with gratefulness, and I see the miracles, feel the love, and enjoy the moment of growth. Don’t get me wrong, that ‘growth’ part is painful because I have to face my demons, I have to be objective, and I have to put in the work that has pain involved.

I am happy because I feel appreciated. I am delighted because I am seen. I am.

[1: 1,959 of 10,000] Loving Even The Imperfection

In Journal on December 5, 2018 at 8:20 PM

I have a new appreciation for not living aiming for perfection and efficiency inspired by the podcast of Rob Bell, The RobCast, Episode 220. I always have the desire to achieve the best works, which means it has the ingredients of being perfect from conceptualization, development, and completion. I do pressure myself of always pursuing perfection.

Yet what I heard/grasp from the sermon (digitally delivered) is imperfection is as beautiful as the perfect one because it was meant to happened that way. It makes more sense when I add it with what I’ve always believed, “everything happens for a reason and nothing is ever wasted,” and this includes all the problems that are often hard and ugly including the memories that I have the habit of escaping and intentionally forgetting to avoid reliving the pain.

Everything is interconnected and one incident leads to another. Nothing is ever a mistake but a wall leads to a detour, another adventure, or to prove to oneself how much something is wanted that I’ll exert all strength that I have to break the wall. It helps that I often lean to optimism when talking about disheartening situations, but now with the new found appreciation, I found a kind of peace and surrender of what is.

[1: 1,958 of 10,000] Patience Vs. Instant Gratification

In Journal on November 30, 2018 at 10:51 AM

I remember when I was a teenager, I thought life is so hard that I am willing to die and make a deal with the devil to make sure I feel better. I try to recollect what were my disappointments before and what pops up is I don’t feel pretty enough and I am not smart enough to be on top of our class.

Now that I’ve experienced the peace when I am truly connected to God, I wondered why would I ever believe the devil will be able to provide what I seemed to feel that I am missing in my life… and it daunts on me that my humanity is looking for instant gratification.

I am beginning to appreciate the advantage of PATIENCE because it is one of the perfect qualities of God. Do not worry about the past and the future but I am to do my best right now. It takes seasons for a flower to bloom and flourish. What I am now is because I’ve endured different experiences and if I was bold enough to learn then I am stronger today.

Being bad and rebelious is not about leaning to the wrong side, if I silent my human weaknesses and lean on the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, my burdens are light and my day is meaningful. I have to practice that muscle and never again will I give in to complacency and rush of getting material accolade instantly. I will enjoy the process, the journey, and celebrate the fruition that culminates an end… and then be brave to begin again.

[1: 1,957 of 10,000] Oh The Confident To Live Long

In Journal on November 23, 2018 at 12:15 PM

My dad died at 49 and my mom died at 58 because of unhealthy living. At 38 I do think about my mortality, I do wonder where will my remains be buried especially that I am not yet rooted in any country. How will I die without causing any distress or inconvenience to my sisters who will be the point person for my body?

Leaving the thought of morbidity aside, I have the desire to live my life without thinking about the future too much. I don’t always have the fascination to make plans that I’ll follow through and there’s that downside that I end up clueless about where will I go then? I am more concerned that I am enjoying my life now. I have the courage to try extreme sports like skydiving because what is life without excitement.

Oh, the confident whenever I go to bed at night thinking I’d wake up with a sunlight the next day. Oh, the confidence that I have many more chances to take a route different from yesterday.