Yor Ryeter

Posts Tagged ‘New Path’

[1: 2,059 of 10,000] Is My White Hair A Sign?

In Journal on July 23, 2021 at 6:12 PM
Photo by Evie S. on Unsplash

I have a little rectangular mirror on my desk, while the sun beams bright, I could clearly examine my face and hair. I turned forty-one this year and I’ve reached the age when biologically there’s remarkable appearance of white hair. I rely on coloring it from time to time not because I want to hide my age but because it didn’t look good having white roots only in some areas.

Seeing my white hairs, I do admit that I’m turning older each year. I could remember my childhood, my teens, my career life in a flash and all the people who I saw as me at this time when I was younger. I’ve called them auntie and now I’m the auntie. Being older, I certainly gained more wisdom and I take less bullshit from people.

Something in my psyche changed when I finally realized that I’m not going to have my young stamina and features and at some point I have to ask am I running out of time of living? Do I still have dreams that I needed to fulfill before it’s too late?

Call it midlife epiphany, but for once in my life, I am taking a chance on myself. I got fired early this year that’s the best thing that can happen to me, either that or I was half-asked to moved into a new country if I want to keep working in a corporate environment. I knew my soul is dying if I don’t change where I’m headed. The truth, I wanted to quit before I got fired, I wanted to get fired only to have a higher payout and start all over. This time I’m counting on my self on to a new path I’ve never imagined. The unknown.

This year, I’ve changed so much, I moved to a better apartment, I’m building my own business that involved a whole lot of spirituality, and I’m growing more white hairs. Is my white hair a sign of being courageous to start creating something that is true to my voice before I continue living in desperation and waking up uninspired?

I don’t know what is the end goal but I know I will keep on living in the moment where there’s always peace and when I’m breathing in and out I can find in my heart that all is well. I don’t know what the future holds, but I know I will have a say about it, how I react and what I create in the moment.