Yor Ryeter

Posts Tagged ‘Obsession’

[1: 1,386 of 10,000] Forget It

In Journal on December 19, 2014 at 6:02 PM

There is something about him that made me swoon. I know he is not perfect but I was drawn to fall for him. I have an immaculate “self-control” because I never give in to admit that I am romantically in love or seduce him in any way. I know if I have ever tried, I can be a very ashamed mistress by now.

I saw him into a live-in relationship, then got married, and now the latest pain I have suffered is him having his very first mistress. It is actually the point where I draw the line, I thought I am saying adieu when he’ll have his first child, oh well it was when the mistress that has appeared out of nowhere that made me snapped. He spoke that he is a loyal person and it was the one thing I thought that was good about him, but the moment he cheated on his wife, I completely questioned his character and the person who I thought I knew for 2 years.

I couldn’t rationalise my affection towards him, he reminds me about myself, he reminds me of my parents, some quirks remind me of my sisters of whom I loved the most, and he has the same birthday like one of my best friends. It could be an illusion adoring him so this time around, I have learned my lesson, and I just need to forget about him.

Few days ago, he remarked that “I miss him” since I have not seen him for so many days; it wasn’t even a question, he was too cocky to ask. I’ve contemplated that statement for 2 days, do I miss him? And then in a chat, I told him, “you have been gone for so long I got used to not seeing you anymore.” I really don’t miss him, but my heart demands that I stay so far away and wish to never cross path with him again.

February 2015, Freedom Day!

forget it lights

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[1: 1,315 of 10,000] My Latest Obsession: BU-BO

In Article on May 16, 2014 at 5:12 PM

Books ObsessionBU-BO meaning Buying Books; and reading them of course! I just purchased AED 869.00 worth of 13 books in few hours. If I did not stop (because it turned out to be an extreme work out for my arms) I could have gotten more. I still love printed books, it’s not about old school but I can carry it where ever I am without the worry of battery life running out.

It’s good for karma (for aspiring published author like me) and it’s good for my starving mind. The surprising thing is I am buying books that were published years back but as I read them they give me all those AHA moments. I am a fan of Oprah Winfrey and she certainly recommended good books. I was right that although I could have watched the whole Super Soul Sunday interview; reading the actual book is still a million times worth it.

Lots of business related books there because I wanted to learn on building a good business; good benefit for my employer and a preparation for my own future entrepreneur self. I can’t wait to finish all of them but not on a hurried reading style since I want to make sure every beautiful piece of advice is inculcated in my being to access it whenever I needed wisdom.

Respect to all authors and here here is my way to show it; buy it, read it, learn it, and the most important is to live those that are relevant to me.

[1: 1,268 of 10,000] Adult Justifies Mistakes

In Journal on January 11, 2014 at 2:28 PM

The problem with adults is we justify our mistakes especially on questionable love.

big-mistake

Hear my crazy thoughts.

  • I am obsessed with my boss.
  • I think I am in love with him.
  • He is crazy charming.
  • He doesn’t even have the best body but he is quite irresistible.
  • He is engaged to be married.
  • He is a Muslim, he converted just to marry his Muslim fiancee.
  • He is arrogant.
  • He is naughty and playful around women with good boobs and asses and worst part is I get jealous.
  • He craves for attention.
  • I know I don’t want him as a husband but I fantasise that he adores me.
  • He is my addiction.

When I was younger, there would be no way that I would even consider thinking romantically with such a man. A portion of my sane brain still tells me that I should stop liking this man already. I am giving myself an ultimatum and I plan to give my resignation by end of February before I commit and blurt something crazy like “will you have sex with me?” or worst “would you want me to give you a blow job!”

That is how insane my brain and illogical heart right now. I don’t know why. Am I being tricked by my age? Unbelievable and I am not feeling very respectful. This has to end and as my Mum says, “If you don’t like a man, stay far away from him.” She’s right! Definitely without doubt and question – right.

I have been obsessing with other men before but I barely remember their names now, what was important about them before, and all I did was kept my long stretched distance.

[1: 1,139 of 10,000] Nothing a Notebook Can’t Do

In Journal on September 8, 2013 at 12:00 AM

1970 Notebook

I am choosing happiness at work starting tomorrow. No more drama!!!!!

Tonight, I will sleep early and gratefully. I was so tired that I know I will finally snooze soundly.

1970 Notebook BackTo make sure I am supporting my optimism I got myself a new business notebook. Love the pick I made from Virgin Megastore. If the front design is in cool grey, the back makes me smile with the presence of yellow hue, the name Waldo (reminds me of one of my favorite philosophers ‘Ralph Waldo Emerson’), got the word ‘Pancake’ – I ♥ love pancake too, and the one line antic about web browsing & coffee shop.

Hello Happiness Here I Am.

 

[1: 997 of 10,000] Stop Feeding Addiction

In Journal on April 21, 2013 at 12:00 AM

WalkingThey say addiction covers up a pain but in my case it is not really taking an alternative happiness but it is simply my obsession. I must be going kookoo and I need to check in because it halts me from my greatness.

I just need to talk about it and it is probably doesn’t make sense to anyone reading this but I am in a lot of stress because I cannot teach my brain to simply stop. I am hoping setting 2 goals could keep my brain from drifting to oblivion. I better be focusing to (1) finishing a book and (2) move to Australia. I better make it work without doubt and definitely minus all the excuses. Help me God.